When you are recovering from divorce after a long-term marriage, loneliness is definitely an obstacle that keeps you from moving on. Take a look at the mindful strategies that can help you kick your loneliness to the curb as you start this new chapter in your life. When we are by ourselves after divorce, we make a false correlation in our minds. We think that being alone is bad. You are now given the opportunity to heal and start over on your termsβthings that would be impossible to do if you were still in an unhealthy marriage.
As counter-intuitive as it sounds, being in a house with a partner in a marriage that is no longer healthy and still feeling alone is much more damaging than being by yourself in a house and having the space to heal. Yes, you may feel like there is nobody to call or to be intimate with. Being by yourself gives you the opportunity to start doing things that you never thought you could do before. Instead of staying at home, you now have an opportunity to channel that energy into attending that sculpture class, joining that book club, or planning that trip to the mountains.
I feel lonely whenever I see a little old couple holding hands walking in the park. I feel really happy when I am around my dogs. There is a soft spot in my heart for rescue dogs and I have always wanted to volunteer there. All my worries seem to disappear when I am working hard in yoga class. I love how it makes me feel and how it forces me to focus on breathing and listening to my body. At the end of the class, I always feel relieved and ready to take on the world.
It does, however, mean that you will have to be introspective and honest with yourself. It can be hard to dig deep, but I promise you that it is worth it because you feeling better and being happy is worth it. The next time I see another Facebook picture of an engagement ring, I am going to look up volunteering opportunities at the local animal shelter instead. My time and energy are better served helping those in need, and who on earth can feel lonely while they are taking care of pups and kitties who need a good home?
The house feels so empty and I am starting to feel alone. Recognize that you deserve to be happy and understand that spending quality time by yourself and in a life that is rich with ideas and hobbies and things that excite and inspire youβand have absolutely nothing to do with having a partnerβcan heal you.
